English: Your mom is so fat that when she walks in front of the TV you miss an entire episode of 60 Minutes.
Collected: Amsterdam, Netherlands (12-16-2018)
Origin: Heard it from her mom
Tag Archives: maternal insult
121618-018
English: Your mom is so fat, her Patronus is a cake
Collected: Amsterdam, Netherlands (12-16-2018)
Origin: Read it on Tumblr, references Harry Potter.
121618-010
English: Your mom plays left-back for St Johnstone
Collected: Amsterdam, Netherlands (12-16-2018)
Origin: He heard it from a Dutch friend, but it is originally a Scottish insult. St Johnstone F.C. is a notoriously bad Scottish football club. Left-back is a notoriously bad position.
090218-011
English: Your mama is so skinny she could hang glide off a Dorito.
collected: Chapel Hill, NC (9-2-2018)
origin: From the playgrounds/hallways of E K Powe Elementary School in Durham, North Carolina
090218-010
English: Your mama is so fat that when she jumps up and down, the Earth shakes.
collected: Chapel Hill, NC (9-2-2018)
origin: Heard in Bozeman, Montana
090218-006
English: Your mama’s so fat, she tripped over WalMart and landed on Target
collected: Chapel Hill, NC (9-2-2018)
origin: A joke he and his friends would tell in high school, circa 2010.
090218-003
English: Your mama is so stupid, she went to a movie that was rated R and it said 17 and over, so she went and got 16 of her friends
collected: Chapel Hill, NC (9-2-2018)
origin: Remembered from his childhood, in Philadelphia.
090218-002
English: Your mama is like a brick. She’s heavy, flat on both sides, and gets laid by a bunch of workers.
collected: Chapel Hill, NC (9-2-2018)
origin: Learned in High School, in Silicon Valley/ San Francisco Bay Area
090218-001
English: Your mama is like a hardware store, 5 cents a screw.
collected: Chapel Hill, NC (9-2-2018)
origin: Learned in High School, in Silicon Valley/ San Francisco Bay Area
090118-003
English: Your mother is so ugly, when she walks outside, everyone starts to run and screams, “Godzilla!”
collected: Raleigh, NC (9-1-2018)
origin: His favorite Jank, used between friends (in childhood) in Jackson, Mississippi